“I got your text.” I held my phone in
the air and smiled.
“I can see that.” Jasper grinned back.
He was sitting on a park bench under the street lamp. There were dark shadows falling over his face, making his cheek bones far more prominent. I would have liked to paint him sitting there; just a man alone on a park bench, the light from an overhead street lamp surrounding him in a soft spotlight. The trees were dark shadows in the background and made me see lurking monsters hiding behind each one.
“I can see that.” Jasper grinned back.
He was sitting on a park bench under the street lamp. There were dark shadows falling over his face, making his cheek bones far more prominent. I would have liked to paint him sitting there; just a man alone on a park bench, the light from an overhead street lamp surrounding him in a soft spotlight. The trees were dark shadows in the background and made me see lurking monsters hiding behind each one.
Jasper beckoned me over and I
slowly walked towards him and sat down on the other side of the bench.
“I was kicked out.” Jasper’s rough voice interrupted the silence.
He turned to look at me with a crooked smile.
“That’s why I moved to NYAA. I was expelled from the last school I was in.
“Why were you expelled?” I was curious, I wanted to know all about him. He intrigues me.
“A lot of reasons.” His voice was heavy and his lips were a thin line.
So it does bother him.
“Which were?”
I want to know, I want to know, I want to know.
“Who said I was going to tell you?”
“Well then why did you call me out here.” I shot him a cheeky grin and moved a little a closer, nudging him with my elbow “Come on.”
He let out a sigh and ran his fingers through his hair; his scars highlighted under the street lamp.
“I got myself into a lot of shit.” He sighed and didn’t continue.
“No kidding. That’s usually how you get expelled.” I’ve always thought it was stupid when people pointed out the obvious.
He gave me this look. His eyebrows were raised and he had a crooked smile. Like he was thinking that he might actually find me quite interesting.
Or just plain nosy.
“You gonna let me finish or what?”
I raised my hands in defence and waved him on.
“There was a bit of an accident. It-” He paused, like he was trying to figure out what words would adequately describe what had happened. “Well, it was fucked up.” He looked down at the floor, kicked a stone and watched it as it rolled away.
“That’s what it was really; it was absolutely fucked up. People got hurt. Not even sure how it all ended up happening but somehow, somehow I ended up with blood everywhere; lots of blood everywhere and there was glass and splinters too. It looked as if someone had cut them all open and painted the floors with them and the walls too. All that red.”
He looked like he was freaking out at just the memory, his eyes had gone wild and he was speaking so fast. His hands were balled into tight fists; his knuckles had gone white. I found myself inching away from him, from the realisation that I didn’t want to hear about it anymore.
“People were sprawled on the floor, with blood pooling everywhere. I hadn’t even realised that I’d done anything, I didn’t mean to. It was just everywhere.”
What is he talking about? What did he do?
He was trembling and I was sure it wasn’t from the cold.
“J-Jasper? Calm down. Y-You don’t have to-” My voice was shaking. He was scaring me and I could barely put my words together. I took a deep breath and tried again: “You don’t have to finish, really. It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me.”
His eyes were darting all over the place as if he expected something to jump out at him; even I thought something might, with all the trees around us. What could have happened that was so traumatising that even the thought of it put him into a state of panic?
Maybe digging into his life is a bad idea, maybe- maybe for once I should just mind my own business.
Really? Is that honestly what you want to do? Have you ever met anyone as interesting and mysterious as him?
Crazy more like it.
That was a good point; never in my life have I known someone like him; crazy he might be. He has something dark and eerie about him and I want to know why.
But the answer may be something that you don’t want to hear.
“I was kicked out.” Jasper’s rough voice interrupted the silence.
He turned to look at me with a crooked smile.
“That’s why I moved to NYAA. I was expelled from the last school I was in.
“Why were you expelled?” I was curious, I wanted to know all about him. He intrigues me.
“A lot of reasons.” His voice was heavy and his lips were a thin line.
So it does bother him.
“Which were?”
I want to know, I want to know, I want to know.
“Who said I was going to tell you?”
“Well then why did you call me out here.” I shot him a cheeky grin and moved a little a closer, nudging him with my elbow “Come on.”
He let out a sigh and ran his fingers through his hair; his scars highlighted under the street lamp.
“I got myself into a lot of shit.” He sighed and didn’t continue.
“No kidding. That’s usually how you get expelled.” I’ve always thought it was stupid when people pointed out the obvious.
He gave me this look. His eyebrows were raised and he had a crooked smile. Like he was thinking that he might actually find me quite interesting.
Or just plain nosy.
“You gonna let me finish or what?”
I raised my hands in defence and waved him on.
“There was a bit of an accident. It-” He paused, like he was trying to figure out what words would adequately describe what had happened. “Well, it was fucked up.” He looked down at the floor, kicked a stone and watched it as it rolled away.
“That’s what it was really; it was absolutely fucked up. People got hurt. Not even sure how it all ended up happening but somehow, somehow I ended up with blood everywhere; lots of blood everywhere and there was glass and splinters too. It looked as if someone had cut them all open and painted the floors with them and the walls too. All that red.”
He looked like he was freaking out at just the memory, his eyes had gone wild and he was speaking so fast. His hands were balled into tight fists; his knuckles had gone white. I found myself inching away from him, from the realisation that I didn’t want to hear about it anymore.
“People were sprawled on the floor, with blood pooling everywhere. I hadn’t even realised that I’d done anything, I didn’t mean to. It was just everywhere.”
What is he talking about? What did he do?
He was trembling and I was sure it wasn’t from the cold.
“J-Jasper? Calm down. Y-You don’t have to-” My voice was shaking. He was scaring me and I could barely put my words together. I took a deep breath and tried again: “You don’t have to finish, really. It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me.”
His eyes were darting all over the place as if he expected something to jump out at him; even I thought something might, with all the trees around us. What could have happened that was so traumatising that even the thought of it put him into a state of panic?
Maybe digging into his life is a bad idea, maybe- maybe for once I should just mind my own business.
Really? Is that honestly what you want to do? Have you ever met anyone as interesting and mysterious as him?
Crazy more like it.
That was a good point; never in my life have I known someone like him; crazy he might be. He has something dark and eerie about him and I want to know why.
But the answer may be something that you don’t want to hear.
We just sat there in silence for next quarter of an hour. He
was sitting there staring off at nothing and I was just looking at him. He’d relaxed
a fair bit; his eyes calm and he’d loosened his fists. His head was resting in
his hands with an elbow placed on each knee. I could see goose bumps covering
his arms, the hairs standing up on end.
I should say something.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t ha-”
“No, Isla don’t apologize. It’s my fault; I shouldn’t have called you out here. I’m sorry.” He let out a sigh and stood up. “You best be on your way then.”
He turned to me and I could see that he’d put up a wall. His eyes were clouded and empty.
Good, cause he was scaring the shit out of me before.
Alex was right when he’d told me to stay away from Jasper; this guy has issues. I should probably keep my distance.
“Yeah, I guess I should be going.” I let out a sigh. “See you at school?” I added.
“Yeah.” He nodded and then stood there awkwardly with his hands in him pockets. Then he sat back down. “Umm… I think I’m just going to stay here.”
It was odd. His body language and tone of voice had changed entirely. He seemed again like that shy guy who I met a few days ago; his confidence had all slipped away. He seemed to have multiple personalities that change each time I see him.
“Alright.” I nodded at him stiffly and walked back towards the apartments.
I was halfway there before I heard the padding of running feet behind me; I turned around to see Jasper jogging to a stop.
“You wanna go for coffee or something? I know a place about 10 minutes from here, it’s good.”
I was about to say “Sure, why not?” until the whole scene of him flipping out popped back into my head and sent shivers down my spine. And I also realized the time; it was 9:15 PM.
Fuck, I’m late.I turned to him and said: “I’m sorry, maybe another time.” And started jogging towards home; I looked down at my watch and eventually broke out into a run.
I stood at the base of the apartment building, leaning against the wall and catching my breath.
Made it. After the stress of being late was off my shoulders I realized that I’d just ran off leaving Jasper standing there in the middle of the path probably thinking I ran away from him rather than running home cos I was late. “Great; you make one friend and you ran away from him. He probably thinks you’re dead scared of him too.” I said to myself and bonked my head against the wall behind me. Probably cause you are scared of him. “Idiot” I grumbled to myself and made my way up to Edith’s place.
Rick answered the door with his usual: “Hey there, kiddo!” He gave me a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek and shuffled me into the living room. He was wearing his favourite shirt: A white T-shirt with a print of Darth Vadar’s helmet on it. Everyone was sitting in the living room; Alex and Joanie were each on their own, navy-blue beanbags perched in front of the PS3. They were both shouting and Alex was laughing hysterically. Edith was sitting on the couch, curled up in a purple throw.
“Late as usual.” Edith smiled and looked up at me. “Where were you this time?”
I sat down beside her and smiled “Hey Edith.” I gave her a tight hug, stalling while I thought of what I’d respond with. I can’t tell her I was with Jasper because Alex would hear and he told me to stay away form him. And I really don’t want to get into another argument with him.
“Sorry, I was in the shower and lost track of time. Didn’t miss anything interesting, did I?”
She gave me a sideways look and for a second I didn’t think she believed me. She stared at me for a few moments. Thankfully, she bought it and snapped into mother-mode. “Well, Joanie already cut your cake for you. Sorry about that. The slices are on the table; want me to get you one?”
“Nah, its fine. I’ll get one later.” I gave her a kiss on the cheek and stood up.
“Isla, what’s that on your neck?” My stomach sank. Fuck, I forgot to cover up the hickey Alex gave me!
Through a mass of “um’s” I managed to come up with it: “Um It was sunny today and-ah- I was out in the field at school and um I got a burn. It’s nothing; I’ll put some lotion on it later.” Before she could retort I turned around and quickly walked over to the boys.
The two of them were in the midst of a bloody battle in Mortal Kombat: Armageddon. Alex was winning of course and laughing his head off while he was at it. The characters on the screen flew from one place to the other in a dance of knives and blood.
“Joanie, isn’t this game a bit too violent for you?” I hung my arms around his neck from behind; leaning my chin on his soft hair. He ignored my question and kept on fighting-pushing all of the buttons on his controller at random.
I looked over at Alex - he was wearing a denim shirt over black jeans with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. I couldn’t help but laugh at the determined look on his face. He was squinting at the screen and his jaw was clenched. And that is when I found myself caught in a sort of daze. I stared at him, starry-eyed and totally out of it. I looked at his pale lips- lips that were pressed against mine only an hour ago. I watched as they split into a smile, exposing his pearl white but slightly chipped teeth. His arms shot up into the air, the controller flying and hitting the ground with a ‘thump’. I felt Joanie slump under me and I jerked forward, knocked out of my Alex-infused daze.
“I give up! I can’t beat you.” Joanie let out a moan. “I’ve tried and tried and tried but, you are undefeatable!” He sat back up and looked over at Alex who was looking back at him with a victorious grin.
“That’s right, Joanie.” He laughed loudly, hooted and stood up “I, Sir Alex Hart!” he said in a loud and deep voice “Am undefeatable!”
I stood up, looking him in the eyes and saying “I bet I could beat you.”
It was quite comical: an underdog taking on the undefeated victor.
“Hand her that controller will you.” He ordered Joanie, our gazes still fixed. “Let’s see what you got, Birthday Girl.” He winked at me and dropped back down to the bean-bag.
I should say something.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t ha-”
“No, Isla don’t apologize. It’s my fault; I shouldn’t have called you out here. I’m sorry.” He let out a sigh and stood up. “You best be on your way then.”
He turned to me and I could see that he’d put up a wall. His eyes were clouded and empty.
Good, cause he was scaring the shit out of me before.
Alex was right when he’d told me to stay away from Jasper; this guy has issues. I should probably keep my distance.
“Yeah, I guess I should be going.” I let out a sigh. “See you at school?” I added.
“Yeah.” He nodded and then stood there awkwardly with his hands in him pockets. Then he sat back down. “Umm… I think I’m just going to stay here.”
It was odd. His body language and tone of voice had changed entirely. He seemed again like that shy guy who I met a few days ago; his confidence had all slipped away. He seemed to have multiple personalities that change each time I see him.
“Alright.” I nodded at him stiffly and walked back towards the apartments.
I was halfway there before I heard the padding of running feet behind me; I turned around to see Jasper jogging to a stop.
“You wanna go for coffee or something? I know a place about 10 minutes from here, it’s good.”
I was about to say “Sure, why not?” until the whole scene of him flipping out popped back into my head and sent shivers down my spine. And I also realized the time; it was 9:15 PM.
Fuck, I’m late.I turned to him and said: “I’m sorry, maybe another time.” And started jogging towards home; I looked down at my watch and eventually broke out into a run.
I stood at the base of the apartment building, leaning against the wall and catching my breath.
Made it. After the stress of being late was off my shoulders I realized that I’d just ran off leaving Jasper standing there in the middle of the path probably thinking I ran away from him rather than running home cos I was late. “Great; you make one friend and you ran away from him. He probably thinks you’re dead scared of him too.” I said to myself and bonked my head against the wall behind me. Probably cause you are scared of him. “Idiot” I grumbled to myself and made my way up to Edith’s place.
Rick answered the door with his usual: “Hey there, kiddo!” He gave me a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek and shuffled me into the living room. He was wearing his favourite shirt: A white T-shirt with a print of Darth Vadar’s helmet on it. Everyone was sitting in the living room; Alex and Joanie were each on their own, navy-blue beanbags perched in front of the PS3. They were both shouting and Alex was laughing hysterically. Edith was sitting on the couch, curled up in a purple throw.
“Late as usual.” Edith smiled and looked up at me. “Where were you this time?”
I sat down beside her and smiled “Hey Edith.” I gave her a tight hug, stalling while I thought of what I’d respond with. I can’t tell her I was with Jasper because Alex would hear and he told me to stay away form him. And I really don’t want to get into another argument with him.
“Sorry, I was in the shower and lost track of time. Didn’t miss anything interesting, did I?”
She gave me a sideways look and for a second I didn’t think she believed me. She stared at me for a few moments. Thankfully, she bought it and snapped into mother-mode. “Well, Joanie already cut your cake for you. Sorry about that. The slices are on the table; want me to get you one?”
“Nah, its fine. I’ll get one later.” I gave her a kiss on the cheek and stood up.
“Isla, what’s that on your neck?” My stomach sank. Fuck, I forgot to cover up the hickey Alex gave me!
Through a mass of “um’s” I managed to come up with it: “Um It was sunny today and-ah- I was out in the field at school and um I got a burn. It’s nothing; I’ll put some lotion on it later.” Before she could retort I turned around and quickly walked over to the boys.
The two of them were in the midst of a bloody battle in Mortal Kombat: Armageddon. Alex was winning of course and laughing his head off while he was at it. The characters on the screen flew from one place to the other in a dance of knives and blood.
“Joanie, isn’t this game a bit too violent for you?” I hung my arms around his neck from behind; leaning my chin on his soft hair. He ignored my question and kept on fighting-pushing all of the buttons on his controller at random.
I looked over at Alex - he was wearing a denim shirt over black jeans with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. I couldn’t help but laugh at the determined look on his face. He was squinting at the screen and his jaw was clenched. And that is when I found myself caught in a sort of daze. I stared at him, starry-eyed and totally out of it. I looked at his pale lips- lips that were pressed against mine only an hour ago. I watched as they split into a smile, exposing his pearl white but slightly chipped teeth. His arms shot up into the air, the controller flying and hitting the ground with a ‘thump’. I felt Joanie slump under me and I jerked forward, knocked out of my Alex-infused daze.
“I give up! I can’t beat you.” Joanie let out a moan. “I’ve tried and tried and tried but, you are undefeatable!” He sat back up and looked over at Alex who was looking back at him with a victorious grin.
“That’s right, Joanie.” He laughed loudly, hooted and stood up “I, Sir Alex Hart!” he said in a loud and deep voice “Am undefeatable!”
I stood up, looking him in the eyes and saying “I bet I could beat you.”
It was quite comical: an underdog taking on the undefeated victor.
“Hand her that controller will you.” He ordered Joanie, our gazes still fixed. “Let’s see what you got, Birthday Girl.” He winked at me and dropped back down to the bean-bag.
We spent the next few hours battling each other in different
combat games and surprisingly enough I was the one winning. Joanie had already
fallen asleep at this point- it was 1 AM after all. But of course, Alex
eventually took the lead and by 2.30 AM I was sick of losing. I tossed the
controlled in the corner and said, in a defeated voice: “You win.” He just
laughed at me and started putting away the PlayStation. While he did that, I
picked up Joanie and took him to his bedroom.
Jesus he’s so much heavier than I remember! No more chips for you, fat ass. I thought as I tucked him in. When I went back to the living room Alex was lying on the couch with this hand over his eyes.
“I don’t get it.” I said as I walked over to the corner table to get myself a slice of cake “You used to be so shit at these kinds of games, I was sure I could win. Next time I’ll get you. I mean I wasn’t even that far off from winning.” I turned back to Alex, cake in hand and I sat at his feet at the base of the couch. I kept on rambling for a bit about nothing in particular while eating my cake; Alex just lying there listening to me. Well, I thought he was listening to me anyway.
Jesus he’s so much heavier than I remember! No more chips for you, fat ass. I thought as I tucked him in. When I went back to the living room Alex was lying on the couch with this hand over his eyes.
“I don’t get it.” I said as I walked over to the corner table to get myself a slice of cake “You used to be so shit at these kinds of games, I was sure I could win. Next time I’ll get you. I mean I wasn’t even that far off from winning.” I turned back to Alex, cake in hand and I sat at his feet at the base of the couch. I kept on rambling for a bit about nothing in particular while eating my cake; Alex just lying there listening to me. Well, I thought he was listening to me anyway.
“Do you want the
French homework we got today? Since you missed class I doubt you’d have to do
it but, it’s easy and only a little so you might as well.” I looked over at
him, waiting for him to respond but, he didn’t. He just lay there with his hand
over his eyes. “Alex?” I put down my now empty plate and tickled the base of
his foot.
“I’ve been talking to myself, haven’t I?” I stretched my arms up and yawned “Hmm, you were that worn out?” I guess you fell asleep and I just didn’t notice.
I moved from his feet, my tiny torso now fitting sideways on the couch in line with his chest.
You always fall asleep on this couch. I let out a sigh. He was cute when he was asleep. Like everyone else he looked much younger but, I’d always thought he looked quite sad while sleeping. When we were little I used to think he’d be having a nightmare so, I’d wake him up. He used to say:
“I look sad when I’m sleeping cos you’re not cuddling me.” And then we’d snuggle together until we fell back to sleep. I couldn’t help but wonder: if I woke him now, would he say the same thing?
I poked his cheek a few times and tapped his nose but there was no response. “Alex? Alex, wake up.” I poked his cheek again but there was still no response. And then I had an idea. I lowered my lips to his ear and blew air into it quickly. I only expected a little jump but, he got so startled that he fell off the couch, squishing me under him.
“Woah, what just happened?” I couldn’t stop giggling but I was trying as hard as I could to keep it as quiet as possible.
“That was priceless, I’m sorry Alex.” I said between laughs. He looked down at me with a confused look on his face which only made me giggle more.
“Shhh, you’ll wake everyone up.” He put his hand over my mouth but he was so sleepy that he didn’t even move it before setting his head down on the carpet next to mine. We were a bit of a tangled mess; his left hand was on my face, my left arm was under him. His hips were slightly over mine and our legs were twisted together.
“Speaking of waking people up.” He murmured into the carpet “Why did you wake me up?”
Why did I wake him up? I couldn’t even remember now. I could feel his breath against my skin. Our bodies were so closely intertwined. I might as well take advantage of the situation.
I slid my hand to the nape of his neck and tugged lightly on his hair as I pressed our lips together. He was suddenly wide awake and he pulled me in closer, his arms gripping my body tightly. His right arm slid down from the nape of my neck to the small of my back and he pulled me in even closer, our bodies moulding together. One of his hands was tangled in my hair and he was kissing up and down my neck and then he was kissing my collarbone, and suddenly his lips were making their way down and my entire body heated up.
The two of us were so caught up in the moment that we didn’t notice the large shadow looming over us. We both jumped at the deep sound of Rick clearing his throat.
Alex and I just stared at him for a good minute; our bodies still twisted together, one of Alex’s hands in my hair and the other still on my thigh. Once we actually processed what was going on, we both jumped out of our little knot and stared up at Rick open mouthed.
Fuck...Fuck….FUCK.
My first reaction was to laugh but when I saw the confused and slightly horror-struck look on Rick’s face, my gaze dropped to the floor. Alex was sitting cross-legged, pressed up against the couch; his gaze also focused on the floor. Rick has known the two of us since we were 10 and knew nothing about our little flings. To Rick, Alex and I were like brother and sister. A feeling of shame flushed over me and I knew my cheeks were probably bright red.
“Um…..yeah. You know what, I don’t even want to know.” Rick looked from Alex to me; from me to Alex and then to the glass in his hand. “I only came out for a drink.” He almost robotically turned around and walked back towards his bedroom. “Edith, wait till you hear what just happened.” That was the last thing we heard him say before he shut the door behind him.
“I’ve been talking to myself, haven’t I?” I stretched my arms up and yawned “Hmm, you were that worn out?” I guess you fell asleep and I just didn’t notice.
I moved from his feet, my tiny torso now fitting sideways on the couch in line with his chest.
You always fall asleep on this couch. I let out a sigh. He was cute when he was asleep. Like everyone else he looked much younger but, I’d always thought he looked quite sad while sleeping. When we were little I used to think he’d be having a nightmare so, I’d wake him up. He used to say:
“I look sad when I’m sleeping cos you’re not cuddling me.” And then we’d snuggle together until we fell back to sleep. I couldn’t help but wonder: if I woke him now, would he say the same thing?
I poked his cheek a few times and tapped his nose but there was no response. “Alex? Alex, wake up.” I poked his cheek again but there was still no response. And then I had an idea. I lowered my lips to his ear and blew air into it quickly. I only expected a little jump but, he got so startled that he fell off the couch, squishing me under him.
“Woah, what just happened?” I couldn’t stop giggling but I was trying as hard as I could to keep it as quiet as possible.
“That was priceless, I’m sorry Alex.” I said between laughs. He looked down at me with a confused look on his face which only made me giggle more.
“Shhh, you’ll wake everyone up.” He put his hand over my mouth but he was so sleepy that he didn’t even move it before setting his head down on the carpet next to mine. We were a bit of a tangled mess; his left hand was on my face, my left arm was under him. His hips were slightly over mine and our legs were twisted together.
“Speaking of waking people up.” He murmured into the carpet “Why did you wake me up?”
Why did I wake him up? I couldn’t even remember now. I could feel his breath against my skin. Our bodies were so closely intertwined. I might as well take advantage of the situation.
I slid my hand to the nape of his neck and tugged lightly on his hair as I pressed our lips together. He was suddenly wide awake and he pulled me in closer, his arms gripping my body tightly. His right arm slid down from the nape of my neck to the small of my back and he pulled me in even closer, our bodies moulding together. One of his hands was tangled in my hair and he was kissing up and down my neck and then he was kissing my collarbone, and suddenly his lips were making their way down and my entire body heated up.
The two of us were so caught up in the moment that we didn’t notice the large shadow looming over us. We both jumped at the deep sound of Rick clearing his throat.
Alex and I just stared at him for a good minute; our bodies still twisted together, one of Alex’s hands in my hair and the other still on my thigh. Once we actually processed what was going on, we both jumped out of our little knot and stared up at Rick open mouthed.
Fuck...Fuck….FUCK.
My first reaction was to laugh but when I saw the confused and slightly horror-struck look on Rick’s face, my gaze dropped to the floor. Alex was sitting cross-legged, pressed up against the couch; his gaze also focused on the floor. Rick has known the two of us since we were 10 and knew nothing about our little flings. To Rick, Alex and I were like brother and sister. A feeling of shame flushed over me and I knew my cheeks were probably bright red.
“Um…..yeah. You know what, I don’t even want to know.” Rick looked from Alex to me; from me to Alex and then to the glass in his hand. “I only came out for a drink.” He almost robotically turned around and walked back towards his bedroom. “Edith, wait till you hear what just happened.” That was the last thing we heard him say before he shut the door behind him.
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